Friday, April 27, 2007

Hey, look!

I figured out how to make links! And my brain kinda hurts now. Oww. How come so many other people think this is so easy?

Now, if I can just figure out how to post pictures . . .


morning conversation

me: "hey sam."

sam: "oh, hi, mommy. you're awake."

me: "how are you?"

sam: "I'm happy. how did you sleep, mommy?"

me: "I slept very well, thank you. how did you sleep?"

sam: [with just a hint of exasperation at having to be so patient with people obviously not as smart as him] "I closed my eyes, mommy."

Thursday, April 26, 2007

stomach flu here

the kind with gut wrenching cramping, body shivering, and much, much, praying for death.

holy cow I didn't remember that pain could feel like this.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Everyone's Best Friend

Sam calls everyone his best friend. There's his best friend Andy and his best friend Nate and his best friend Ivy and his best friend Zeeny and yes, even his best friend Mommy. Well, last night I had some students over and the doorbell rang. One of the other students with me said, "Oh, that's Cassie. I saw her pull up." Sam jumped up and ran to the door shouting, "My best friend Cassie?" (He'd never met her before. Ever.) Cassie, who heard what he said, asked, "Am I your best friend?" To which Sam replied, "Oh, yes!"

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

We're living in the dark ages here

So, it's not enough to have no cell phone. (I'm paying a friggin $80/month for an answering machine. Curses on Verizon.)

But our home phone isn't working, either. Sometimes works. Sometimes doesn't. Sometimes gives no dial tone. Sometimes turns my voice into this creepy robotic freak show that creeps people out so much that they can't understand a word I'm saying. (I'd curse Comcast for this, but I can't because that's were the husband works. I'll just have to sic him on it.)

It's like it's 1865 around here. Without the polygamy. (Except maybe for that cranky old guy across the street who's always suspiciously hanging out with like five old ladies. This did used to be Taylorsville . . . Hmm . . .)

Flushed Away

My cell phone. Down the toilet. Not once. But twice. The first time it was just completely non-functional. This time, it's not even there anymore.

Dang babies.

Sam's Drawing

Sam (three year old) spent a good ten minutes concentrating fiercely on his drawing this afternoon. When he was finished, he brought it to show me.

"Wow," I said. "What is it?"

"It's you!"

"Oh, great! What's that?" I pointed to a small black circle-scribble thing on top.

"That's your face."

"What's that?" I pointed to a yellow scrible below (and not connected to) the small black circle.

"That's your hair."

"What's that?" I pointed to a FREAKISHLY HUGE circle scribble below the yellow scribbles.

"That's your belly!"

And then he just laughed.

A nice piece of pie

Three year old came up to me today with his dad's shoe on a plate. "I made this for you, Mommy," he said. "It's a niiiiiiice piece of pie." [insert dramatic hand wave.] "Take a bite!"


Going to Sam's Club ten minutes before closing

There's something so exhillarting about rushing into the store and throwing stuff into your cart as if you're on one of those "shopping spree" things where you have five minutes to grab everything you want. And then, your cart is full of $300 worth of groceries and it only took you ten minutes and you just feel like all-powerful or something. I totally reccomend it.

Monday, April 16, 2007

Two grown men at Sam's Club

were standing transfixed. One of them was a contractor--dirty and weary looking at the end of the day. Another was a Sam's Club employee--arms crossed in front of his vest. There was no one else around. No wives. No children. They didn't seem to know each other. The contractor held loosely to his shopping cart and the employee stood a few feet away. Both were utterly engrossed.

What were they staring at?

A TV. Playing the new Cinderella sequel.

That's right.

The princess Disney movie Cinderella. The sequel.

I found something about the scene both touching and amusing all at once.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Cute stuff my kid says

He says a lot of it lately.

1) "Oh, Daddy. You got a hairs cut." (Actually makes more sense than haircut, if you ask me.)
2) Upon my waking up: "Oh, Mommy. Wow. You're alive."
3) Upon my getting dressed for work: "Oh, Mommy. Nice dress up!"
4) When playing with two dolls, one "Mommy," and the other one "Me": Me (in a demure, soft tone): "Mommy?" pause "Mommy?" pause. "Mommy?" pause. "Mommy?" Upon which, the Mommy doll snaps into reality and shouts, "WHAT!!!???"
5) "Mommy, you're the best Mommy ever. AND . . ." [tone softens to indicate true deepness about to be communicated] "You are going to be a girl FOREVER." (That's my plan, kid.)

When you buy a "more accurate" scale

we all know that you're supposed to weigh LESS than you did on the other scale. Because if the scale was TRULY more accurate, it would know that you are NOT THAT FAT. Sheesh.

Back up to 194 (from 190). For goodness sakes.