Wednesday, March 31, 2010

In which Sam mysteriously morphs into a hysterical 14 year old drama queen AND a Jewish mother *at the same time *

me: "Sam, you've got to help clean up a bit."

Sam: [watches TV show.]

me: "Sam? Can you hear me?"

Sam: [watches TV show.]

me: [turn off the TV so he can hear me.]

Sam: "MOM!!! Why would you DO that?!"

me: "Because I'm trying to talk to you about cleaning up and you aren't listening."

Sam: [eyes well up with tears.] "But you KNOW that the TV is my *favorite thing in the world.* How could you take it away from me?! I thought you *loved* me!"

me: "I do love you. But I need you to come to your room now and clean it up."

Sam: "CLEANING?! But that is HARD! It makes my arms hurt! And my legs! It causes me SO MUCH PAIN! You wouldn't hurt me like this, would you?"

me: "I would. You need to clean up."

Sam: "But... but..." [openly starts sobbing: loud] "Have you forgotten that I'm you're favorite son? What kind of person does this to their *favorite son*?!"

me: "Okay, I don't want to listen to this. Let's have you go finish this fit in your room. While you clean it."

Sam: [sobs] "If you weren't such a terrible mother, none of this would be happening!"

me: "Do you need a nap? You sound like you need a nap."

Sam: "NO!!! I just need you to UNDERSTAND! For ONCE!!!"

(Sara was there. She can add any dialog I forgot. Good times.)


bff said...

That's my Sam. Actually, that's YOUR Sam. Do NOT let him get with Nate on one of Nate's WORST DAYS EVER!

This is very, very funny stuff.

Sara Black said...

yeah i think that's about right! :)