Sam: [points to Ellen] "Mommy, I think it is just so amazing that a girl who just showed up on the Tonight Show once is now sitting there, one of the judges."
Steve: "How on earth did you know that she started on the Tonight Show?"
Sam: "Have you SEEN the size of my head, Daddy? My brain is HUGE. Like, amazingly huge. I'm a very smart boy."
me: "I agree, kid."
Sam: "You know what I think, Mommy? I think you should be on this show."
me: "I'm too old. You have to be 28."
Sam: "And you're what? 31? Close enough. I think it could work."
me: "You also have to sing."
Sam: "You've got a good voice! It's almost as good as mine. And I'd be willing to help you practice. In fact, here's what we're going to do. Tomorrow, when I get back from kindergarten, we're going to sit down and I'm going to teach you what it takes to be a great singer."
me: "You're going to teach me?"
Sam: "Of course! I think you have potential. I've gotta warn you, though, you really are going to need to do some work. But I think you're up for it."