Thursday, October 22, 2009

Writing Quote of the Day

“Many people believe that authors of children’s books eventually ‘graduate’ and go on to write books for adults. That’s like saying your pediatrician may get good enough to, one day, be a doctor for grown-ups.”

from Joy Feldman, author of The Gollywhopper Games

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

And then, when I show Steve the picture of Sam he says

"Oh, he is really cute."

And Sam hears and pipes up from his floor/bed: "Yes, I really am cute. I'm so cute that it almost makes my heart sad."

Sometimes when you go to the bathroom, you get more than you bargained for

Like, maybe when you open the door, you find a meditating Buddha. And you say, "Omigoodness! It's Buddha!"

And the Buddha says, "What seek you?"

And you decide to go with it and you say, "I seek wisdom and the secret to Zen."

And Buddha says, "Hmmm... The secret is... You laugh hard and you leave the door open."

Which, really, is much deeper than you expected anything in the bathroom to be.

Monday, October 12, 2009

Evening Conversation

Sam: "Mommy. Why did you marry .that. man?!"

me: "You mean Daddy? What's wrong with Daddy?"

Sam: "Where do I START?!"

me: "He told you to go to bed, didn't he."

Sam: "He doesn't understand about my body. See, in the morning, my body has sleep. But at night? No sleep."

me: "Sounds like me."

Sam: "Oh, geez. You can take care of this, you know."

me: "How? I already take Ambien."

Sam: [shakes head] "You're still a pretty girl. You can find someone ELSE."

me: "Other than Daddy? But I like him."

Sam: "There's got to be someone else you can like. Maybe a friend? Maybe someone from work?"

me: "I think they'd make you go to bed, too."

Sam: "UGH. You people are IMPOSSIBLE."

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Morning Compliment

Lily: "Morning Mommy."

Me: "Morning, Baby."

Lily: "Huh."

Me: "I said 'morning, baby.'"

Lily: "No. I mean your boobs."

Me: "They're under my nightgown."

Lily: "They're UP."

Me: "Hallelujah."

Lily: "Up is better than down."

Me: "Okay."