Things Beauty Queens Say

Me: "Why don't you spend the night at my house tonight? Since you don't have air conditioning at yours?"

Miss Provo: "Because I can't."

Me: "Why?"

Miss Provo: "Because I can't go to the gym without my eyebrows."

Me: "Huh?"

Miss Provo: "I can't go *anywhere* without my eyebrows. Not to the gym, not to the grocery store. Nowhere."

Me: [?!][silence][?!]

Miss Provo: "Seriously. I can't be SEEN without my eyebrows."