Memorial Day Assurances: Brought to you by SAM

me: [just waking up]

Sam: [shaking me, hence the reason I'm waking up.]

me: "Hi, Sam."

Sam: "Oh, good. You're awake."

me: "Yup."

Sam: "Okay, well, I just wanted you to know something."

me: "Mmhmm?"

Sam: "In case you, you know. Don't make it."

me: ???

Sam: "And that's just that I love you. I'll love you even if you're dead."

me: "Thanks, baby." (I think...)

Did you not get the memo? 5 year olds = Not Allowed to Judge Me

[Sam and his friend are walking through the house]

Sam's friend: "Why do you have so much stuff everywhere?"

Sam: "Want to play legos?"

Sam's friend: "Is this the room your cat sleeps in?"

Sam: "I don't have a cat."

Sam's friend: "Why does it smell like cat poop, then?"

Sam: "We had a dog once. And a fish. The fish died."

Sam's friend. "Your house is really a mess."

Sam: [says nothing]

Sam's friend: "Why is your house such a mess?"


It reminded me of this one time a few years ago when we all had parasites and no one cleaned the house for two months. When I could finally stay upright for twenty minutes without fainting, I called one of those cleaning ladies in the phone book for help.

She said no. My house was too messy for her.

Grrr.

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the publishometer.