The epic battle: Falcon versus Bob

One of assignments in class is to write an unbiased informative research paper on something that "freaks you out" and to then post the paper on Wikipedia for the world to see. (That way, if you really *are* biased, *everyone* can tell you about it.)

One of my favorite students, an adorable boy named Bob, wrote his paper on Sanguinarians--or, the type of self-described vampire who actually drinks blood.

Well, when he posted his paper, some dude named Falcon took it down in, like, five minutes! So he posted it again. So it came down again. So he posted it again. etc.

Apparently, "Falcon" is a vampire who has deemed himself keeper of the Vampire Wiki page.

I'm excited to see who'll win!

Roid Rage

Sam got prescribed these steroids for his asthma and they've turned him into a crazy little ADHD kid who can't stop running around or talking. He talks constantly. And when he doesn't talk, he sings. It'll be three in the morning and he'll be standing all red-eyed at my bed talking seventeen thousand words a minute. And then he'll break into song. And then he'll run around. While singing. I asked him, "do you just have a lot of energy, or are you hopped up on drugs?" And he said all maniacal, "I'm hupped un drugs, mommy."

I haven't slept all week.

I can't take much more of this, people.

explains a lot, huh

just heard on the radio this morning that Utah is officially the "most depressed" state in the US.

I hear they're thinking of putting Prozac in the water, along with Fluoride.

Sam is a Famous Feminist now!

This picture of Sam doing the sign for "help" was just posted on the FMH advent calendar. So funny. :-)

Eight years ago today...

I walked into a room where Steve was sitting, waiting for his Rhodes Scholarship interview, and thought to myself, "Huh. That kid is in my *family* somehow... but... which part?" Then because I was all hyped up from having just finished *my* interview, I sat down and said [talking about 1000 miles a minute], "Hi, my name is Kerry. Let me tell you about my preferences for food flavored in basil, math text books written in a sans serif font, and the last conversation I had with my mother..." [that was a paraphrase...but pretty close. :-)]

Now we're all married and stuff and really *are* family. Yay for nerves that make me blabbermouthy!

If you were in Cali, isn't that where you would go?

I went to visit the biggest windmill farm in north america this thanksgiving and it was awesome!



My mom thought it was a little weird that the place I wanted to go most was to see the windmills, but, oh well. I thought it rocked!

But we went other places too that were fun. Like the Nut Tree Family Park!



I had a great time on the Merry Go Round.



Lily was less than impressed.

Is this kid adorable or what?!

Sam at the Nut Tree Family Park in Cali:

Well, seeing as I'm a college WRITING professor and all, this is kinda embarassing

Cash Advance Loans

Had to look the picture up, Travis. Couldn't help myself. :-)

Not the only boots girl

this is a picture of my maternal grandmother. apparently, she was really proud of her boots, too.

Lily's new boyfriends

We sat next to these guys on the plane home from Cali yesterday:

Lily was a shameless flirt. She played peek-a-boo, she made her eyes go all coquettish, she laughed and babbled and touched their hair. She even demonstrated her head-butting technique on her dad in an attempt to get them to let her join the team. They discussed it, but decided she was too tough for them. And, that, yanno, her whole plan for world-domination didn't quite jive with the team agenda. But they blew her a kiss anyway cause she's purty cute.

I'm thankful for...

pictures that make me laugh

Bad Hair Happens

My cousin Sarah just sent me this picture of her kiddo...

When we're stupid we think that we're wise

So, I just finished reading a thoroughly horrific (not only preachy and didactic and self righteous, but a complete misunderstanding of analysis, critical thinking, and, yes, even the friggin English language) student paper and it's made me wonder...

you know how the Book of Mormon warns against thinking that being learned means that you're wise?

I think we've taken it too far.

Ignorance was never a virtue, people.

COME ON, NOW!!!!

Every now and then, students rock

Whenever I get a cold, it goes immediately to my voice and I sound like a gravelly meth user.

Thus, the following conversation while teaching:

girl student: "Did you lose your voice?"

me: "No, I'm just talking like this because I wanted to sound sexy."

boy student [straight faced] sitting on front row: "Well, it's *working.*"

Today's Bravery Award Goes To...

Sam! Who didn't cry at all when he got his flu shot today! He scrunched his eyes together and said, "ow... ow..." but then he took a trembling breath and didn't cry!

which made me cry.

ironic, isn't it?

Apparenty, I used to have a brain

My mom just sent me this excerpt from a family Christmas letter:

"[Kerry] is constantly writing, although she is only in Kindergarten." He then says: "She spells strictly phonetically. For example: "I am sary," or "wy nyd a baby bessing." Marty said, "It's nice to find notes saying, "I love you dadee."" He also says, "We play a math game, I say a string of problems like 3 plus 7 take away 4 take away 2 double that, now what's that equal? She gets 4 out of 5 right."

Wha' happened, people?!

Lily's reaction to the last post

"Shoe! Mama! Mama! Shoe! My Shoe!"

[happy laugh followed by triumphant tone and poking at my poor computer screen]

"SHOE!!!!"

Lily luvs shoes

All you gender un-essentialists out there, consider this:

my one year old is passionatey in love with her shoes.

I'm not kidding, either. She rocks them like they're baby dolls. She makes up songs about them. One of her only words is: "Shoe." Or, alternatively, "My shoe." [insert relieved giggling and much hugging of said shoe.]

Sometimes, if she's crying, you can give her a shoe and she'll stop.

Sometimes, she takes her shoes to bed with her like a not-so-cuddly security blanket.

This one is her absolute favorite:

"House" is just like Scooby Doo

It always follows the same format, but you love it, yanno?

(Plus Hugh Laurie is hot.)

Here's a Picture of my Parasite

The labs came back

And I *do* have a parasite.

Me: "Seriously? A parasite? This is America."

Doctor: "Well, dear, when you live with people who think it's funny to eat their own poop, this kind of thing is bound to happen."

Me: "But this is America."

Doctor: "I know. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to call the Health Department." [shrug] "Mandatory reporting and all."