Just got this proposal emailed to me. In exchange for turning in a paper late, this student is willing to let me chose one item from the list for them to do:
Walk around all day with a pen mark on my face Sing “Popular” for class with cookies Talk in pig-Latin all day—even though I don’t know how Pretend to pick some gum out of a random girl’s hair Wear a Harry Potter scar on my forehead Read my most embarrassing journal entry (about boogers) to the class (with cookies) Actually be to class on time---in one of your classes next semester. (Then you would say, “Good job, N****! But, sadly, you got the wrong semester.” Then I would say, “Darn!”) Pinch some random guy’s cheek and say, “oh! How precious are you?!” Talk in a fake accent the entire day Wear a totally mis-matching outfit on day Stalk someone Write on people’s arms that sit by me, “I love you” Go on a blind date with a guy of your choice Block the door of a building and make people “say the magic word” to go in Do a cartwheel while screaming on the grass during passing time Throw a snowball at a hot guy and apologize by giving him my phone number Buy you a Christmas present Eat some grass Do a Gollum impersonation (with cookies, of course) Speak in opera tones Dye my hair a weird color Actually buy presents for my family this year Wear a toga to school Wake my roommates up in the middle of the night (and record it) by screaming, “The snails have got me! The snails have got me!” (this would be so embarressing...) Put snow down someone’s shirt and run off screaming, “you’ve been hit by the psycho penguin! Wear a tutu to school Abstain from using a really common word for a whole day…and if I use it I must squawk like a chicken Quote “The Princess Bride” for the class (with cookies, of course) Act crazy (er) Play “Mary had a little lamb” five times in a row in the Wilk eating area REALLY LOUD AND OBNOXIOUS Start a protest against boring teachers Write a letter to your boss describing how wonderful you are Smile all day with spinach in my teeth Work at Taco Bell and address at least three people as “my cutie pie” Eat nothing for a whole day Imitate someone in the class and have everyone guess who it is Act out a scene from a book everyone knows… Wear flip-flops in the snow and when people exclaim at me how weird I am just reply, “My feet get too hot during the winter.” Get a wheelchair, go to the mall with a friend, and be the retarded sister who is abused. (This is from personal experience.) Wear a prom dress to school Wear a toilet paper turban for the duration of the class Try to get my middle splits down by next Wednesday and record my progress in inches. Drink a liter of something during class Teach the class my favorite song “The Mysterious Ticking Noise” (with cookies, of course) Give out medals to random people for being “worst dressed” Go on a blind date and pretend to be “deaf” and record my experience :P Jump off the high dive in swimming and scream: “Aphrodite!” on the way down Wrap up all my chewed pens and give to someone as a Christmas present Sing “I’m a little Teapot” while going to the bathroom in a public restroom Play truth or dare with the class…two truths and two dares. Do a death scene Hop around the room yelling the names of the seven dwarfs Make a phone call to someone’s mother and tell her that her son/daughter needs one hundred dollars Sing everything I want to say Quote Monty Python (with cookies, of course!) Think of five words that rhyme with my name and make them into a poem Give the heaviest person in the class a piggy back ride Yodel and dance around for 30 seconds Do thirty push-ups as if I’m in the army (with cookies for the class, too!) Lick my foot…for some reason Give you two cookies and a back massage during class For a minute, sing improvised opera about a subject of your choosing Tell everyone who my first kiss was (this is actually a REAL cause for embarrassment and no one else has a story as weird as this…) with cookies! Lick the floor? Kiss someone on the cheek Play “Baby if you love me…” with the class Answer all questions in class as if I were a character out of a book or movie (the class decides which character)
I was feeling particularly moody and/or crappy and/or down on myself this morning. So, I did what I normally do when feeling particulary moody and/or crappy and/or down on myself: I started playing the piano. I'm not super great at the piano, but I like to play it. I make up songs and play songs I like and somehow by the end, I usually feel better.
Well, today I was playing and it just wasn't helping. "Listen to this drivel you're playing, Kerry," thought I. "You're a stupid hack who obviously can't write music and obviously *anything* you try to write is going to be crappy. I mean, seriously! Listen to that melody line!"
I listen to the melody line.
And suddenly I realize that I haven't been playing something that *I* wrote.
I've been playing Dvorak.
Like, one of the greatest composers of the 19th century.
(You can hear the BYU men's chorus sing what I was playing here.)
One of assignments in class is to write an unbiased informative research paper on something that "freaks you out" and to then post the paper on Wikipedia for the world to see. (That way, if you really *are* biased, *everyone* can tell you about it.)
One of my favorite students, an adorable boy named Bob, wrote his paper on Sanguinarians--or, the type of self-described vampire who actually drinks blood.
Well, when he posted his paper, some dude named Falcon took it down in, like, five minutes! So he posted it again. So it came down again. So he posted it again. etc.
Apparently, "Falcon" is a vampire who has deemed himself keeper of the Vampire Wiki page.
Sam got prescribed these steroids for his asthma and they've turned him into a crazy little ADHD kid who can't stop running around or talking. He talks constantly. And when he doesn't talk, he sings. It'll be three in the morning and he'll be standing all red-eyed at my bed talking seventeen thousand words a minute. And then he'll break into song. And then he'll run around. While singing. I asked him, "do you just have a lot of energy, or are you hopped up on drugs?" And he said all maniacal, "I'm hupped un drugs, mommy."
I walked into a room where Steve was sitting, waiting for his Rhodes Scholarship interview, and thought to myself, "Huh. That kid is in my *family* somehow... but... which part?" Then because I was all hyped up from having just finished *my* interview, I sat down and said [talking about 1000 miles a minute], "Hi, my name is Kerry. Let me tell you about my preferences for food flavored in basil, math text books written in a sans serif font, and the last conversation I had with my mother..." [that was a paraphrase...but pretty close. :-)]
Now we're all married and stuff and really *are* family. Yay for nerves that make me blabbermouthy!